ADD/ADHD and money

[Andrew Zyjewski]

I have been formally been diagnosed as having Adult ADD/ADHD (53). I am currently taking my meds which by the way are working great. But I still have a problem with my finances. Holding onto and saving money seems impossible. This frustrates me to no end. Does anybody else have this problem and maybe found a solution ot it. I could sure use some tips and advice.

[Christy Meador]

I too have issues with money. I seem to spend it like I have it. And when I do have it, keeping it is next to impossible. It's like I have a hole in my pocket. If I have just $30, I need to go get breakfast or coffee. I tend to spend everything I have very quickly.

I am a stay at home mom, so I really shouldn't need cash for anything, but I feel that I MUST have it or I might get stranded or something. My husband isn't opposed to me having cash for emergencies, but when I blow through $100 a month, he starts to question me, and rightfully so.

I wish I had an answer, but if anyone out there has a solution, I'm willing to listen too.

[doug puryear]

see above reply. sounds like your emergency money may be getting spent on non emergencies?

specifically, how much do you need for an emergency?  and how much can you reasonably blow per month (should be more than zero).  lets say $20 and $20/month.  at the beginning of each month you get a $20 bill for this.  when it is gone, it is gone, emergency or not (carry a cell phone for emergencies).  if you dont spend it, you'll have $40 for the next month, lucky you.

good luck

doug

[Christy Meador]

Doug ~ 

I had a meeting with my Psychiatrist on Friday, and we actually talked about the money issue. One of my weaknesses is getting stuff that we just don't need at the grocery store. She suggested that I make a grocery list and try to estimate how much that trip would be. Then take that amount of money out of the bank in cash. Go to the store, get what's on the list and nothing else, using the cash. If needed, leave the credit cards at home. And don't take the kids to the store! They always want something, and I have a hard time saying no. I told my husband that if I had to, I would have him put me on an "allowance". He was ok with the idea, he just doesn't want it to "look bad". I told him that I would rather it look bad than go into debt. I like the emergency money idea. It might make me want to save money just so I would have more money in my purse.

Christy 

[doug puryear]

this is a common add/adhd problem.  we are impulsive, for one thing.

there are a lot of strategies to help cope with it, some of them may not be appealing to you, depends on how big a problem this is for you.  for example, #1.  get rid of all your credit cards.  but-- but----  but----

make a shopping list before you go to the store and dont let yourself buy anything that is not on the list, even if on sale and a great buy and youve always wanted one.

have a certain amount set aside from each pay check before you get it.  have it go into a savings account which you can only access on the signature and agreement of your partner/friend.

have two checking accounts, bills and other.  your check goes into the bills account.  pay all the bills first before you put any money into your second account.

for one month write down every penny you spend, then sit down and look at where your money is really going.

and many many more.  they all need you to really be serious about doing something about the problem or you wont do them.

i, personally, am not good with money.

good luck

doug

[Tammy 1967]

I too have the same problem.  Money envelopes help me... though I'm still lousy at budgeting, I can keep a tighter rein on my expenses if I designate envelopes for ex. Groceries, Clothing etc...THEN SEAL THEM until needed.  I HAVE to make a list prior to going to the bank as I'm always forgetting things like change for laundry etc if I don't. 

Nice to know we're not alone :)

Tammy

[Laura Goodman Cross]

Yes, I have this problem also.  And no, I haven't come up with any easy solution...yet.  But I have heard of Dave Ramsey, a financial guru who has a lot of good suggestions or formulas for getting out of debt, spending habits, etc.  It's only a suggestion but you might want to check out his website.

I wish I could give you an easy solution becuz if I had one, I would be happy to share it with you.  I guess I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

sincerely,

laura

[Connie]

I have the same problem and these solutions work for me.
1. To save money, try opening a savings account in a bank that you will almost forget that you have. You can have money directly deposited into this account on a monthly basis, and you'll be less likely to spend it because you'll forget that you even have it.
2. Have all bills automatically debited from your checking account. This is great if you tend to forget about paying a bill, which is an ADDer problem.
3. Before buying something, clarify if it is a "need" or a "want". If it's a "want", use the three day rule: by day three, you will have either forgotten about the item, or no longer want it.
4. Before going to the store, make a list and stick to it. If it's not on the list, don't buy it.
5. Keep your receipts and leave all tags on EVERYTHING until you are ready to use it. That way, if you've over spent your money, you can return several of the items. I've done this several times. One time I returned about $60 worth of stuff that I didn't need. But keep in mind that some stores keep track of how often you make returns, and will stop allowing you do this anymore.
6. While shopping, walk around the store with the items for a while before going to the check out. You are likely to put some of the items back on the shelves or racks. The money that you didn't spend could be put in that savings account that you almost forgot about.

[LISA HOWARD]

Hi there Connie I have the same problem to I will go in to the store and see some that I don't need but I still get it.I always been that way I will keep your  solutions in mind.Thank you

[Trasonda Maharaj]

I think all ADDers have this problem. Everyone I know personally certainly does. I do wish I had more control. LIst don't work for me because I always forget to take the list, and then if I take it I forget to read it. I also forget to take things back until it is WAY past the deadline, or I loose reciepts. The one thing that sometimes helps is to walk around and think about it awhile, if I'm not in a hurry. If I have time to really shop, I will leave half of what I have collected at the register.

[doug puryear]

trasonda

you have done a good job of starting to identify and specify some of the problems.  the next step, if the problems are significant to you. would be to devise strategies for one or two of them.  most likely for example, how to make sure you take the list and that you read it.  problem, strategies, rule, habit.  once you have that down, you could work on the deadline and receipts issues.

for one crude example, you might make a rule that the list is always on your credit card with a rubber band.  clik

best wishes, doug

[Christy Meador]

Connie ~ 

1. As far as saving money, my husband has done this. I know that we have an account and my name is on it, but I have no idea how much is put in per month or how much we currently have in the accounts.

2. The bills are automatically taken out, and I LOVE it! You're right. I don't have to worry about anything getting paid.

3. If I am somewhere by myself and I see something I want to buy, I don't have the willpower or the know-how to distinguish between a "want" or "need". It all becomes a need at that point.

4. I do the list thing. It works fairly well. Sometimes I have to go back to the grocery store in the middle of the week, but seeing as how it is right across the street, it's really no big deal.

5. I just can't seem to bring myself to return things such as trinkets or clothes. It's a real problem of mine.

6. I try to get in and out as quickly as possible.  If not, I'll see something that I like and I might pick it up and end up with it at the register.

With it being Christmas season, one of my saviors is online shopping. I will go to the site and order what I want for that specific person and checkout. There is no store for me to "browse" in and no last minute items for me to pick up.

Going back to number 1. I'm getting better with my money and I am in the process of being brought up to date with what accounts we have and what we have in them. We are having a meeting with our Financial Adviser soon, and it's going to be like a crash course for me so I'll know what's going on.

[Connie]

Getting in and out is great way to avoid over spending. I like that.