Are ADDers Drama Magnets?

[Dana Arcuri]

Do you ever sense that your life is a continual roller coaster of chaotic events filled with over-the-edge circumstances keeping you in a "fight or flight" response 24/7?  As an ADDer, do you find yourself caught up in one stressful mishap after another?  Whether you're habitually running late, forgetting to pay your bills, losing your keys, saying something you deeply regret or simply getting yourself in a pickle, it's rattling your jagged nerves & leaving you downright exhausted! 

If the above scenario sounds a bit too close to home & you relate, would you agree that ADDers have a gift for attracting drama?  To say it bluntly, I'm seriously believing that ADDers are drama magnets.

It's NOT that ADDers are looking for drama.....in reality we are actively attempting to AVOID it to the best of our ability.  Yet, the never-ending chaotic events are beckoning at our heals.  We unexpectedly discover unusual circumstances that lead to increased stress, insomnia, worse ADHD symptoms and every imaginable emotion, including high anxiety. 

Perhaps, my own horrendous weekend with one disheartening challenge after another may actually not sound so unpleasant, but just like another day in the life of an ADDer?  Whatever the case, after this weekend, I've determined that I am the QUEEN OF DRAMA MAGNETS!!!

Anyone else have the same hunch as myself?  What types of mishaps & drama's have you gotten yourself into, lately?

[Roberta Fucci]

Actually ADDers create chaos because it then makes dopamine
For their brain (which it lacks). It's a catch 22 since it
also creates stress in their life hence the rollercoaster feeling. 

It's what makes them fun people to be around, but you also need quiet time away from the drama. 

[Dana Arcuri]

While many articles & books may suggest that ADDers lack sufficient dopamine, none specifically address why the stimulant medications, such as Ritalin, do not reduce the individuals need of chaos.  If stimulants are meant to replace the lacking dopamine then why are ADDers still creating the unnecessary chaos?  Shouldn't the dopamine significantly reduce this inner need?

[Roberta Fucci]

I'm far from an expert, but perhaps the Adder gets a perceived high from the chaos and are addicted to it. Like adrenaline junkies. Everyone wants to feel good. I don't think any of the meds work 100% or even >50% to solve the dopamine issue. But you guys and gals are brilliant so u can't have it all!  ;  )

[Dana Arcuri]

When we get right down to the nitty gritty truth of the matter, "real life" is too mundane & boring.  While the average non-ADDer is completely comfortable with a 9 to 5 schedule filled with routines on a day to day basis, the ADDer is not wired that way & typically finds this basic lifestyle bland, dry, flat & not the least bit stimulating.  Does anyone else feel this way?

[Sarah Gardner]

I agree.  Folks without ADD/ADHD live totally boring lives.  I do not think we are drama magnets.  If the "normal" folks had as much going on in their lives as ADD/ADHD people do, they wouldn't have time to meddle in everyone else's lives.

[Amy T]

I completely agree that ADD'ers cannot live boring lives.  I am so under-stimulated doing boring things that my attitude begins to show it.  This is when I have lost jobs. I think part of the problem is my way of complaining and making my feelings known.  Taking meds for my moods has definitely helped with that, but I still notice on days that I lack stimulation I simply tend to get little accomplished.  I make up for it on the days when I am so "on" that I just can't stop!  Pressure is good for getting me motivated, but it also causes me to panic.  I have found that structure is the key.  There has to be a plan, a goal, and a feeling of accomplishment.  

[Margaret]

I personally think that it is a maladaptive coping mechanism that we all develop early on. Most ADDers will tell you that they work better under pressure. Adrenaline can have similar effects to dopamine, but MORE, MORE, MORE!! We do literally become adrenaline junkies.

Besides, working on the "if you can't beat it, join it" theory, life as an ADDer is chaos anyway, so we might as well enjoy it!!

[Dana Arcuri]

Margaret, I agree that ADDers tend to lean toward being adrenaline junkies, but I think we still must seek safe & productive methods to manage the chaos & reduce our stressful lifestyles.  It's all about balance so we may enjoy the ride!

[Chronicle]

I tell people that I work better under pressure all the time.  It is a fact.  Less pressure =  less stimulus = less focus...  At least for me.

[Cindy T]

Yeah, for me too. I MUST BE BUSY with at least several projects going at once. I also think, for me anyway, I tend to be a 'people pleaser', maybe some sort of low self esteem from seeming different from all the kids at school (I never saw THEM counting the holes in the ceiling tiles!).

[Dana Arcuri]

Jim, some ADDers do work better under pressure so you do have a great point to bring up! 

[Chronicle]

Adam that is a good possibility. I thought maybe I was just like that. It is good to see that others have that issue to.  I used to cross the line in one area to please someone in another area... Which then causes issues in the one and so on and so on...