Multiple Diagnoses, what's attributable where?

[Lisa G]

My son has been diagnosed with ADHD, OCD (obcessive compulsive disorder) and Tourette's Syndrome. I find it very difficult sometimes to determine the things he's doing are disability related or behavior related. I'm wondering if anyone else has similar issues?
I spend my time trying to learn as much as I can about his diagnoses and he will do something that is typical teenage behavior but magnified about 1,000 times (sure feels that way) and I'm left wondering how to deal.
Things get difficult around my house. I'm the ONLY parent involved and there have been times were I have to practically lock myself away just to have a moment and think things through. The meds aren't doing a great job in managing anything at this point. It's a terribly long, arduous process in getting them correctly aligned. One I'm currently working with the doctor on. However, until then it can feel like hell on earth at my house. I'm stressed and don't seem to have anyone to turn here either. Stinks!
He's a great kid with an boudless imagination! He's smart, social, and very handsome. If he and I make it through adolescense, he'll have quite the future. ;o) We'll make it through, I just may rip most of my hair out in the process. So what say you all? Is anyone in the same boat or has been and sailed on to calmer seas? Words of advice always welcome.

[NerdyMommy]

I don't have any experience with that - but I just wanted to tell you to hang in there! I'm sure it's completely overwhelming at times - that part, I understand totally. You will both make it through, I'm sure! And don't worry - you always have us to turn to! We're here for you, Lisa!

[CharlotteB]

I'm feeling for you! My son is a teenager with ADHD, OCD and tics, but was diagnosed right after 3rd grade. I remember vividly the struggle to get the right meds, and the right ones regulated! I thought I might pull out all my hair, but amazingly did not. Things are so much better now, but the normal issues of teenagers are much more magnified, and I still spend a lot of time worrying issue by issue, event by event. Right now is the hardest for you as you try to get the meds right. Hang in there!!!

[Lisa G]

Thanks so much for the words of encouragement. They do help so much!

[Heather]

Lisa, My 10 year old son has been diagnosed ADHD and ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder). Much of what you were saying about your son sounds very familiar. I certainly will not let him get away with misbehavior and use his ODD as an excuse but at the same time I need to remember that it's there and consider how that effects his reactions to life. Medication is always a struggle. My son has glaucoma and therefore can only have non-stimulants which greatly reduces our options. Unlike stimulants which can start working nearly immediately non-stimulants do not. So once he starts a medication we have the issue of will he even swallow it... if he will, then we wait at least one month for it to kick in but with med adjustments it could be up to a few months. It can be a very long frusterating process. Sometimes he gets so irrationally angry I have to hold him down so he won't hurt his brother or sister. When I do he claws at my arms and the backs of my hands which HURTS and makes me mad. Sometimes, at my wits end I find myself locking myself in my room while he is screaming and pounded outside the door. But this child who will threaten to kill me, screams threats at his brother and sister and the neighbor kid, is the same child who wants his hugs at night and was curled up on my lap this morning because he was cold. When he was younger I would find myself chasing after him barefoot down the middle of the street. Now that he is older I just let him go. Just the other day he ran out the door and into the darkness.... in a tee-shirt and barefoot. We live in Minnesota, everything is covered in snow and ice. I figured his feet would get cold and he'd come back.... He did. If he hadn't of I would have gone after him for his own safety's sake. I have found the child safety locks on our car a God-send and Thanked God for his protection the time the safety locks haven't been activated and he has thrown the door open in a rage while the car in in motion. We have all had the distinct pleasure of driving over an hour down the road with him screaming at the top of his lungs the entire time.
sometime I wish I would put a sign on him. "Child for Sale: Sweet, Caring, Highly Imaginative" and pray that nobody reads the fine print or the attached warning label.
I know that wasn't exactly encouraging. Just wanted you to know you aren't alone on this stormy sea.

[anna]

Hi there, I have a 14 year old that was diagnosed with adhd at 7 and another son who is 9 that is still undergoing testing because it was originally thought that he just had adhd, but upon further testing that was ruled out,yet in the school setting he definately has adhd tendencies but at home and elsewhere it presents as something else that seems more like ocd and therefore our thoughts were that he did not have adhd because we were not seeing those signs accross the board so I wonder if he could actually still have adhd just with a dual diagnosis of ocd as well such as your child has. I give you credit for doing it on your own. At least I am married and have help to deal with these challenges. All I can say is be consistant and hang in there. It may be worse until it gets better but show your son your love and commitment to him and he will come out as the great person he is.

[Rochelle]

I am really sorry that you are the ONLY one dealing with all that is going on in your life. I do not have any advice for your son, but do agree with NM on this. You have us. And there are a lot of parents on this site who can help with ideas.
Hang on and in! We are here for you.

[Lisa G]

Thank you all so much for your words of wisdom and encouragement! It does help greatly. At least at this point I can say that the good days outnumber the bad. And that's saying alot sometimes. Thanks again everyone!!

[Jim Drey]

Lisa

I just found this forum and signed up in order to respond to you! Actually to all parents who have kids that have been diagnosed with ADHD.

It's possible that I might be the oldest person who belongs to this website--not really sure! There are two reasons that i mention age--the first is that I (we) lived through what you and the others are living through--and I feel for each and every one of you regardless of where you might be--at the beginning, middle or perhaps teen years, or later--I (we) are fortunate that we are in the after since my son is now 27! Getting to know and understand his ADHD and OCD were very challenging, on a continuous loop, always changing to the point where even we had to take our own time outs.

Each child is different in how, when or why they display their certain piece parts; sometimes controlled, sometimes not! Regardless of your child's age (or anyone else's), the best advice that I could give is be patient. And you wil will need to be patient, positive and supportive regardless of the behavior!VERY DIFFICULT to do consistently, but the more you do, the better it gets.

The other reason that I mentioned age is because at age 52 I was diagnosed as an adult with ADD. When I received that info--everything, and I mean everything that I had experienced since I was three or four actually made sense!

I am well aware of just how bad 2008 was for many people--it was the worst of my 59 years...the company that I was involved with in attempting to bring to market a new product "went under'...my brother unexpectedly died in the middle of the year...three sales positions didn't work for me....and I had a triple by-pass (NO symptoms!) in November!

I consider my self to be the luckiest, most fortunate and humbled guy on earth!! could not be happier that we are well in to 2009, since I am getting back in shape, my mind is working well again, and that I have re-dedicated myself to ADHD, ADD and most importantly, the children. Every day I am learning more ABOUT THE CONDITION known as ADHD and in becoming a better Child and ADHD Advocate!

Hang tough! "Blessed are they who are flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape!"

I'd be happy to chat with you

Jim Drey

[Janet Rothstein]

I know, my son is diagnosed w both mood disorder and adhd yet he is greatly talented, funny, loved but I fear the drug future and balance of it all.
I know polly Draper (actress ftom" thirty something"and mom of the boys who star on "the naked brother band" nickolodean channel) made a movie about tourrets syndrome because her kids and husband have it along w Adhd. They are doing great w their coaching and meds as well as being great athletes and so funny creative. I may not be giving exact help but definitely hope for your situation. Your son sounds like he needs to self regulate a bit and the future is good. not going to happen on a straight forward plan without some interception. I think for our kids, coaches, routines, and the cutting edge at home ways of manipulating alpha brain waves will be an accepted available treatment soon. I heard from a USA fencing competitor's dad, who's son has adhd, that they had an alpha room at the olympics he went to before his challenges and it was very effective.

[Janet Rothstein]

I know, my son is diagnosed w both mood disorder and adhd yet he is greatly talented, funny, loved but I fear the drug future and balance of it all.
I know polly Draper (actress ftom" thirty something"and mom of the boys who star on "the naked brother band" nickolodean channel) made a movie about tourrets syndrome because her kids and husband have it along w Adhd. They are doing great w their coaching and meds as well as being great athletes and so funny creative. I may not be giving exact help but definitely hope for your situation. Your son sounds like he needs to self regulate a bit and the future is good. not going to happen on a straight forward plan without some interception. I think for our kids, coaches, routines, and the cutting edge at home ways of manipulating alpha brain waves will be an accepted available treatment soon. I heard from a USA fencing competitor's dad, who's son has adhd, that they had an alpha room at the olympics he went to before his challenges and it was very effective.