What are Learning Disabilities?

[Heather]

My daughter has just been diagnosed with Inattentive type ADD and Learning Disabilities.
I understand the term "Learning Disabilities" but that is such a broad term. Are there specific learning disabilities? What are her learning disabilities? I don't understand any of this. I also don't know if she should be on medication or not. My son got put on Meds because things simply couldn't continue on the way they were. He was violent and angry and something had to be done. My daughter, on the other hand is not like that at all. But she does struggle in school. I don't want her to have to struggle with focus and understanding instructions and wondering what's wrong with her because it takes her so long to get her work done the way I did when I was young.
Part of me wonders if she has ADD at all or if it's strictly the learning disabilities and my own lack of working with her on homework as regularly as I should be. I not saying she doesn't after all her brother and I have both been diagnosed so I really don't doubt it at all but I can't help but wonder....
If she didn't have learning disabilites and if she lived in a well organized home with good structure and knew exactly what to expect day to day.... would she still be ADD? Is this a problem with her brain or a problem with the environment in which she has been placed?

[Kay Marner]

Please don't beat yourself up for not being a perfect parent. (I'm telling you this, but I do it all the time!) We do our very best with the time, energy, and internal resources we have, and hope that our love makes up for the rest!!

Who made the diagnoses? I'd go back to them and ask for specifics.

Kay
My PIcture Perfect Family

[Kathleen Christensen]

Learning disabilites, if I remember this correctly, are areas where there's a discrepancy between a person's general abilities (maybe based on IQ?) and a specific ability. There are different types of reading disabilites, for example. If dyslexia is still a current term, that would be an example of a learning disability.

"Learning disabilities" is a general term. Just knowing your child has some kind of learning disability doesn't seem very helpful. I'd ask for more specifics, and if you don't get more specific information from the practitioner you've seen, I'd try someone else. (Taking notes can help when you're getting info from a doctor or psychologist or whomever, too. I always do that, because I forget the most important things sometimes!)

Kids with ADD are more likely than others to have learning disabilities, so it wouldn't be surprising for a child to have both.

Homework. Aaaaargh! A recent study on homework suggests it might not even be that helpful academically for elementary school children, and maybe not even for middle school kids, and not in huge quantities for high school kids either. I did a blog post recently that has a link to an article about that that I think has a link to the research. The blog post is here: http://headintheclouds.typepad.com/head_in_the_clouds/2009/02/the-l.... I'm not crazy about homework at all at my daughter's age (fourth grade)--seems like there are lots of other skills that are important to develop--social skills, physical abilities, creative talents, family relationships, housework skills! OK, I could go on and on about homework ...

A combination of multiple genes and environmental factors lead to ADD. And the genetic piece is big. I always forget exact numbers, but I think it's in the range of 60 to 80 percent. (Don't quote me on that!)

If your daughter lived in a well-organized household? I grew up in a pretty well-organized household, but I ended up with pretty big-time ADD! I know the experts always recommend structure for kids with ADD. But that's not so easy for a parent with ADD! (I'm speaking from experience here!) I guess what I'm mainly trying to say is you're not causing the ADD! And I sometimes wish there was more acknowledgment out there of the difficulty of creating structure as a parent with ADD. I also think ADD parents can bring different kinds of positives to their children, like flexibility, novelty, creativity, fun, and an understanding of what it feels like to have a different kind of brain from the mainstream.

As far as taking meds, some will say never to do that, and some will say it's the only treatment. But I think it's a personal or family decision, and sometimes a hard one. Hallowell and Ratey have a fantastic chapter on making the medication decision in their book "Delivered from Distraction." (There's a link to the book on Amazon on my blog if you're not familiar with it. I think it's a great, balanced, big-picture, beatifully written book on ADD. I'll bet it touches on the relationship between learning disabilities and ADD too.)

OK, I've gone on and on. Hope this is helpful! All my best, and don't beat yourself up!

Wait, one more thing: Here's a blog post I did on the differencs between boys and girls with ADD: http://headintheclouds.typepad.com/head_in_the_clouds/2008/10/those.... And short post with a link to an NPR show on girls and ADD: http://headintheclouds.typepad.com/head_in_the_clouds/2008/11/npr-o.... Here's a site that has good info about girls and ADD (which tends to look different in girls from in boys): www.addvance.com.

[NerdyMommy]

Ditto Heather, to the comments from Kay and Kathleen! You are not causing your daughter's ADD, at least not with the way your house is run or because you don't work on homework with her as often as you think you should. True, genetically, you may have had something to do with it - but you can't blame yourself for that.

Whoever diagnosed her learning disabilities should have been much more specific with you. There are all sorts of LDs - from reading to writing to math. Definitely follow up on that and find out exactly what the problem is, and how she can be treated for it.

Like Kathleen said, medication is a personal decision. I do tend to look at it this way - you're not marrying the medication. You can try it even for a day or so, decide that it's not what you want, and it is out of your system as soon as the last dose you take wears off. So it's not a commitment. But if you're not comfortable with it, that's your decision. There are plenty of other ways that you can help her deal with her symptoms.

Just don't blame yourself. It's not your fault, Heather.