Anything & Everything ADHD
An Open Letter: To All My Teachers
I've been flooded with memories since my ADHD diagnosis especially from my high school years. It's reopened a Pandora's box that I would rather have closed. I'm not as angry now as I was when I wrote this a few weeks ago and I'm not even sure why I'm posting it. I love to give credit where credit is due but seeing as how I don't want to be subject to any libel suits, even though it's all true, I've XXXX'd out the names.
To all my teachers,
To my freshman english teacher who's name is not worth remembering. If you got any pleasure from humiliating a 14yr kid by calling her stupid and lazy in front of the whole class for the entire duration of the class, I have plenty of therapists that may be able to help you out. I did buy the book, I did try to read it numerous times. "Don Quiote" was the most boring, intolerable books I ever tried to read. I'd also like to know, if I was so stupid, how did I get into an Honors Regents English class in one of the best high schools in the city?
To Sr. XXXXXXX, you're mean bulldog face, booming voice and gargantuan hands made you the scariest teacher in the school. You were always nice to me. I don't know why you took the extra time to help me with Algebra, (which I never did learn) but I knew what you were doing and I was grateful.
Mr. XXXXX, principal of my second high school after I was asked to leave the first. You asking my mom for $100 to make my "incident" go away was criminal. You having me expelled for things I had not done was deplorable. You victimized me, a confused child who was already beginning to suffer. It's a shame after you got reported you still managed to keep your job. How many others did you take advantage of? I heard you recently retired and I hope you don't live long enough to enjoy your pension.
Two more high schools later with the same story and I find myself at XXXXXXXX High.
Ms. XXXXXX, I know your job was stressful but you were unfit to manage the crayon room in romper room. You screaming at me that I would become a criminal helped contribute to my almost becoming one. I'm sorry if disassembling the fire alarm and throwing my books out the window was more interesting then listening to you. What noone told you was that I had passed your remedial math class already but it was back in 6th grade.
Mrs. XXXX, thanks for letting my take my typing final over when I showed up for my intial exam and you thought I was drunk. I was'nt drunk but self medicating with almost the exact same drugs I'm getting prescribed now. I know you had good intentions when you suggested I get alcohol counseling. Thank you for taking an interest in the welfare of your student.
Ms. XXXXXXXX, you were nothing short of a biXch. You telling me that you could'nt wait for me to take my GED so I would'nt waste everyone's time anymore actually inspired me to finish. Yah, I gave it some hard thought. The school was warmer then hanging out on the MetroNorth train tracks especially since my dad punished me by denying me a winter coat. I hoped my going to school would prolong my dad's petition to Family Court for a PINS certificate on me and I knew my staying would be especially irritating to you which made it all the more worthwhile. Yah, and I WAS laughing at you when you got reprimanded by your boss for trying to suspend (again) me over a skateboard and some waterguns.
Ms. XXXXXXX the vice-principal, you actually cared. Thank you for telling me you were happy I liked riding my skateboard to school. I had no problem keeping my promise of not riding it in the hallways and would leave my waterguns home if you let me keep riding it there. Thank you for not letting Officer XXXX arrest me for my alleged assualt. I did feel bad about it and apologized to the guard. I also told her, I was'nt bad I was just scared. Do you know she also did actually care?
To Mr. XXXXX, I have no idea why I slept through your social studies class, but when I got you for economics you saw I saw the "big picture" and let me slide on the homework as long as I passed the tests. I understood the checks and balances and capital gains and what it took to keep a healthy checkbook. You'll be proud to know I've made plans for my future and limit the interest I pay that I can't claim to the IRS.
Dr. XXXXXX, you were the BOMB!!!! Your Attendence Improvement Dropout Prevention Program may have saved my life. If anything it kept me in school. Thanks for telling all 45 of us kids that we all had high reading scores but horrible attendence, thanks for telling us we were'nt stupid or bad, thanks for making those classes so fun. Forgive us for the times we stressed you out especially for that Career Day field trip. Thanks for also not calling my mom all those times I got picked up or screwed up, she had told you she really could'nt take it anymore.
Mrs. XXXXXX, Ms. XXXXXX, Ms. XXXXX, to you my thanks the most. Thanks for knowing I was not just nice but also smart and telling me so. Thank you for figuring out the more I was punished the more I acted out. Thank you for giving me structure and a reward system. Thanks for giving me special projects and putting me in charge of other kids. Thanks for giving me hope in my hopeless life, a break when a really needed one and a sense of accomplishment when everyone else was calling me a loser. Thank you for giving me an iota of self esteem. Thank you for knowing my home life was even more chaotic then my school life which was nothing more then gloom and doom. I don't know if you know but many many days I only went to school so I could play in gym and see you. To still this day I would jump off a roof in a clown suit for each and everyone of you.
To all my teachers good and bad just so you know, it took me 5 and 1/2 years to finish HS. I left my father's home while trying to finish school and worked two jobs so I could pay my bills, but I DID finish. There were no proms or graduation parties, just that piece of paper that said DIPLOMA. My accomplishment shows I was never lazy or stupid or bad. It proves I am a driven hard worker, very resourceful and extremely motivated. I did not die of a drug overdose and I am not incarcerated. I've worked for the same company for almost 20 years, I own my own home and I'm even going to go back to school. It is truly a travesty not all "bad" kids make it like me.
To all my teachers,
To my freshman english teacher who's name is not worth remembering. If you got any pleasure from humiliating a 14yr kid by calling her stupid and lazy in front of the whole class for the entire duration of the class, I have plenty of therapists that may be able to help you out. I did buy the book, I did try to read it numerous times. "Don Quiote" was the most boring, intolerable books I ever tried to read. I'd also like to know, if I was so stupid, how did I get into an Honors Regents English class in one of the best high schools in the city?
To Sr. XXXXXXX, you're mean bulldog face, booming voice and gargantuan hands made you the scariest teacher in the school. You were always nice to me. I don't know why you took the extra time to help me with Algebra, (which I never did learn) but I knew what you were doing and I was grateful.
Mr. XXXXX, principal of my second high school after I was asked to leave the first. You asking my mom for $100 to make my "incident" go away was criminal. You having me expelled for things I had not done was deplorable. You victimized me, a confused child who was already beginning to suffer. It's a shame after you got reported you still managed to keep your job. How many others did you take advantage of? I heard you recently retired and I hope you don't live long enough to enjoy your pension.
Two more high schools later with the same story and I find myself at XXXXXXXX High.
Ms. XXXXXX, I know your job was stressful but you were unfit to manage the crayon room in romper room. You screaming at me that I would become a criminal helped contribute to my almost becoming one. I'm sorry if disassembling the fire alarm and throwing my books out the window was more interesting then listening to you. What noone told you was that I had passed your remedial math class already but it was back in 6th grade.
Mrs. XXXX, thanks for letting my take my typing final over when I showed up for my intial exam and you thought I was drunk. I was'nt drunk but self medicating with almost the exact same drugs I'm getting prescribed now. I know you had good intentions when you suggested I get alcohol counseling. Thank you for taking an interest in the welfare of your student.
Ms. XXXXXXXX, you were nothing short of a biXch. You telling me that you could'nt wait for me to take my GED so I would'nt waste everyone's time anymore actually inspired me to finish. Yah, I gave it some hard thought. The school was warmer then hanging out on the MetroNorth train tracks especially since my dad punished me by denying me a winter coat. I hoped my going to school would prolong my dad's petition to Family Court for a PINS certificate on me and I knew my staying would be especially irritating to you which made it all the more worthwhile. Yah, and I WAS laughing at you when you got reprimanded by your boss for trying to suspend (again) me over a skateboard and some waterguns.
Ms. XXXXXXX the vice-principal, you actually cared. Thank you for telling me you were happy I liked riding my skateboard to school. I had no problem keeping my promise of not riding it in the hallways and would leave my waterguns home if you let me keep riding it there. Thank you for not letting Officer XXXX arrest me for my alleged assualt. I did feel bad about it and apologized to the guard. I also told her, I was'nt bad I was just scared. Do you know she also did actually care?
To Mr. XXXXX, I have no idea why I slept through your social studies class, but when I got you for economics you saw I saw the "big picture" and let me slide on the homework as long as I passed the tests. I understood the checks and balances and capital gains and what it took to keep a healthy checkbook. You'll be proud to know I've made plans for my future and limit the interest I pay that I can't claim to the IRS.
Dr. XXXXXX, you were the BOMB!!!! Your Attendence Improvement Dropout Prevention Program may have saved my life. If anything it kept me in school. Thanks for telling all 45 of us kids that we all had high reading scores but horrible attendence, thanks for telling us we were'nt stupid or bad, thanks for making those classes so fun. Forgive us for the times we stressed you out especially for that Career Day field trip. Thanks for also not calling my mom all those times I got picked up or screwed up, she had told you she really could'nt take it anymore.
Mrs. XXXXXX, Ms. XXXXXX, Ms. XXXXX, to you my thanks the most. Thanks for knowing I was not just nice but also smart and telling me so. Thank you for figuring out the more I was punished the more I acted out. Thank you for giving me structure and a reward system. Thanks for giving me special projects and putting me in charge of other kids. Thanks for giving me hope in my hopeless life, a break when a really needed one and a sense of accomplishment when everyone else was calling me a loser. Thank you for giving me an iota of self esteem. Thank you for knowing my home life was even more chaotic then my school life which was nothing more then gloom and doom. I don't know if you know but many many days I only went to school so I could play in gym and see you. To still this day I would jump off a roof in a clown suit for each and everyone of you.
To all my teachers good and bad just so you know, it took me 5 and 1/2 years to finish HS. I left my father's home while trying to finish school and worked two jobs so I could pay my bills, but I DID finish. There were no proms or graduation parties, just that piece of paper that said DIPLOMA. My accomplishment shows I was never lazy or stupid or bad. It proves I am a driven hard worker, very resourceful and extremely motivated. I did not die of a drug overdose and I am not incarcerated. I've worked for the same company for almost 20 years, I own my own home and I'm even going to go back to school. It is truly a travesty not all "bad" kids make it like me.
Comment
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Comment by Mags Smith on August 17, 2009 at 3:15pm -
Wow!
I train teachers about ADHD - may I read these out as part of my course?
_0_
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