I am having a serious internal battle right now and I guess I just need to vent to people who actually mean it when they say "they understand what I'm going through", ya know? Ok, so here's the scenario: my family & I are in the process of moving into a new home. And for all intents & purposes this is a really good thing, it really is. We will now have SO much more room for us & the kids, etc. So I do know, in my heart of hearts, that this is a good thing....however....it's now crunch time and we are down to like the last night or 2 that we'll be in this house & let me tell you, right now, internally, I am an absolutely wreck! I'm talkin, need to pop a Valium just to keep from totally spazzin out kinda wreck! Because even though my husband & I have known for some time now that we HAD to find a bigger house & everything, I am a person who is only 100% comfortable when I am in my own home & for 6 years now THIS has been my home & now I'm faced with the fact that within the next 48 hours I am going to have an entirely new place that I know I will call "home" but it will be some time before it actually feels like I am at "home" & that whole concept has my stomach in knots!!
Now...here's the huge conundrum that I continuously find myself in: I know I have ADHD (& probably several other acronyms) & I know that these rediculous thoughts & feelings are a direct result of my "specialness" (lol) BUT at the same time I am extremely analytical & contrary to popular belief I do possess a great deal of common sense & logic. So I have the one half of me that says to myself, "Self, you know that "home" is not a particular building or structure but it's wherever you are with your family that makes a building a home, and you know that you just have to give it a little time & soon, then new house will feel like home." To which the other half of me can only reply with ".....SO!" Lol Logic & Common Sense don't apply to the ADHD part of my brain! That part of me, for some stupid reason, allows me to get all wrapped up in the neggative aspects of a situation. You'd almost think I enjoy wallowing in anxiety! (which I don't, by the way, just incase you thought it too! Lol)
Ahhhh, ok I actually feel better now! Isn't it amazing what pooring your heart out to a bunch of total strangers can do for the soul! Hahaha
Til next time, remember this, "The only thing that is truly "the end of the world" is...the end of the world" - Charles Schultz :-)