Well, after months of unsuccessfully job-hunting, I have finally accepted an offer and started last week. So far, I love the office environment, all of my co-workers, the office culture and level of structure, and the committment to the clients served by the agency. That being said, however, I am beginning to realize that I am as unsuited for this particular position as I would be to plan and execute the next space mission to Mars. I have been hired as a care coordinator and program developer and am working to develop a program from the ground up at our agency. Let's be really clear that while I am a very good social worker, I REALLY REALLY REALLY suck at all things administrative. I lose paperwork and forget to file it and I am so computer illiterate that I can't even download a photo! This job is extremely computer intensive and entails about 10 meetings a week with various community agencies with coordination of services between all of them coming through my office. I sat through a five-hour training today in which I literally did not understand a word of what was said. It was a training on the software utilized by our state insurance provider and a techie was walking us through the program to teach us all how to maximize our efficiency on the system. Well, I didn't even know what he meant when he said that with this program we could work with three open tabs, and that was the simplest thing he said all day! (IF you think I am exaggerating and really do know what three open tabs is, I can assure you that I am not). Anyway, it isn't so bad right now because I am brand new and no one expects much out of me, but that will change soon and I am so afraid of failing at another job. The weird thing about me is that I am very, very good, almost gifted, at one or two things and then really awful at almost anything else. I think I am like Forrest Gump or Rain Man and if you get me out of my VERY NARROW niche, I am just useless. I would so much rather be normal with average abilities spread across a number of domains rather than limited as I am by an almost complete inability to do so much that is required in the working world today. Particularly regarding technology of any kind, I am impaired beyond belief. I found myself thinking today that if I wanted to authorize services, why couldn't someone just fax over a request and I could sign it and send it back like in the "good old days" rather than struggling through the complexity of a computer program in which I am lost, dazed, and confused. Anyway, I have rambled long enough. I am grateful for the job and am going to do my very best to succeed despite my limitations. At least I have motivation going for me!