Hi Dana, Thanks for the welcome. I have a 17 year old daughter who was diagnosed when she was 14...it hasn't been easy, but it's been an experience that I wouldn't trade for anything. My 12 year old is going through testing right now. Don't really know what's going on with her....it's always something isn't it? Have a wonderful day!
Thank you for the "welcome" Dana! I'm glad someone actually read my info. How would you know to look for it, just out of curiosity?
I lived in Williamston, MI from the age of 6 or 7 years until 57, and then a year ago we moved to Grand Rapids. We are enjoying the hilly, wooded landscape here, unlike the flat Saginaw Valley area that includes Midland :-)
Thanks again for the welcome, I enjoy making new friends!
I'm sorry my comment back to you was so long. Haven't had enough coffee (stimulant!) yet this morning and forgot to go back through and edit my comment for brevity's sake!
Like you, I wasn't diagnosed until after I'd been an adult for awhile and struggled with writing a great deal. I was in my university's literature program, and my papers were usually late. Though I made A's, I was so frustrated and well, embarrassed really, when I couldn't finish college writing projects that I kept taking time off from college and working in the corporate world. Since beginning college in 1988, it has taken me 20 years to get to the point where I am about to get my doctorate!
For me, I would research extensively, know everything (maybe too much about my topic), and then be unable to write when I sat down to do so. This wasn't terribly conducive to college writing. :)
I am taking medication, which does help me focus. I have also learned that my best time to write, for reasons I can't understand but have grown to respect, is from 3:30 a.m. (!) until 10 a.m. So I go with that, waking up early. (On the good side, it works. And I get to watch the sunrise and hear the birds wake up.) Still, each morning, it takes me around an hour to wake up, let my meds pick in, and begin the actual writing process. I set writing goals for myself each day, and another ADD writer friend and I do weekly goals to make sure we're staying on track.
When I got interested in ADHD and writing, hoping to parlay my own personal difficulties into a useful dissertation topic that might be useful to others, I had to shift from being literature focused to being rhetoric and composition focused, which is another area in my English Department. This switch has not been easy, as there is so much new stuff to learn.
Congrats on getting back into writing. For me, there was so much shame involved in not being able to write. Was that your experience with shame? (Don't answer if you don't want, as that's kinda a personal question - I have found that people sometimes feel it's shameful to talk about shame, which is okay, but unfortunate, I think. Also, can you tell me about the particular writing challenges you faced? When you do write successfully, what do you think enables you to do that?
What other alternative treatments have you used that are successful? I'm looking for all the help I can get here and would love to hear your ideas!
Thanks for writing back to me. I hope to hear back from you!
Hi Dana, it's good to hear from ya! I have not been on for so long, except a couple of times, but just browsed, didn't say anything. How are you? What is going on in your life? I had surgery on my knee May 22. It is slow healing but that is expected. There is supposed to be six to nine months of the healing process. I'm back in school and have all classes online this semester. They are Comp 1, Technical writing and American Politics. No thrills. Lots of work with the comp 1 and technical writing being together, essays, proposals, all that junk I know nothing about. I have changed doctors and the new doctor was not satisfied with my diagnosis and treatment of ADHD for the last 4 years, so he is having me tested which is in the waiting. It was a three hour test of questions, putting puzzles together, etc.. boring. I am currently on abilify for depression and then of course adderall, thats it. I feel alot better, ya know there for awhile they had me on four different meds. Anyway, great to hear from ya. I'm gonna try to get back to this site more on a regular basis. I miss it. Talk at ya later.
hey there, I just caught up on your post about the online articles thing! How is all that going? Hope is going well for you my friend, you have been very supportive to me and my family and I want you to know I really appreciate that always! There is one issue though that I have to be honest about, it is the whole Steelers thing! JKing, the pics with the cat are funny!
Hey, sorry I have not been on the computer in like a month! I just commented to Lee that I had this infection that blindsided me in my craniotomy incison and opened up the wound like a split watermelon dropped on the road! For a month I have been in Acute Care Treatment to get the infection under control, it was in the incision, skin, and my skull. Now that it is controlled and I am on an antibiotic regime of high dose killer stuff, I am back to radiation and chemo and feeling as good as I can! I am back to riding the motorcycle here and there and that helps my mental health to forget about the cancer world for a time. I will catch up on the site and try to be around if nothing else surprises me. See ya!
There really is something for everyone here :) I'm laughing about your "cheese" series...a former roommate was very into the "cheese" book and it makes me think of her...
Hi DANA,
You've been busy on this site. Sharing your faith is very cool here! I just listened to your 'More Love, More Passion' a couple of times--thanks for the encouragement. God is cool and He never ceases to amaze me... I keep being surprised.
Well, to answer your question: I worked to set goals for the areas in my life that were not easy to focus on. That slowed things down a bit as well as reinforced that those things that I worried about WOULD get handled. With some space from the stress and reinforcement from people in my life, I then moved on to focus on my strengths...positive steps build on each other and dealing with the challenges in life by taking a step at a time...a 'trigger' at a time so that the stress is reduced. Focusing on the 'encouragers' has been huge to stay on track.
Well Dana to be honest with you , Im no longer angry @ my friend for betraying the way she did , how ever I am discusted with justice system for the way they treated me , I am also discusted with DSS in how they treated me and Jeremy both . I am that my little boy got lucky to be placed into a good foster home with a big spritual family just like mine ( on my mom's side) . Do I hate the way all of this turned out - yeah most definately but I am also kinda relieved that I don't have to worry about William any more , I am relieved that I no longer to have to go o court any more because being involved in a custdy battle takes alot of your mental & emotional energy . I am happy that my little boy is happy and that he is adjusting well considering everything that he has been through . You see dana I am the type person I love being involved in stuff and love to be busy - i especially love being a mom and I know now at the age of 28 that I am more mentally , emotionally and physically ready to be a mom , than I was when I got pregnant with William @ the age of 19 . Fact is jeremy & I have talked for the last 9 yrs about our dream to have our own home & to have a family of our own . Now as for me being on medicaton for my ADD I am not and I have not been on medication since I was 17 , as a matter of fact my ADD actually improved when I got pregnant with William - I guess it was just the pregnancy hormones in them selves , ever since then I've not had any problems concerning my ADD . My OB has actually told me that not being on medication for my ADD and me learning how to handle my ADD on my own is actually better for when I do get pregnant again . She has also stated that the fact tha jeremy is not taking any stimulate medicaiton for his ADHD is quite good right now since we could possibly become pregnant . Jeremy has been taking the omega 3 along with Ginkgo & Ginsing and it seems to be working . Jeremy has stated that he does not like the side affects of stimulate medication because a his labido decreases plus the fact that when ever the bed time comes , he's still wired up so that's why he chooses not take any stimulate medication for his ADHD - not to menton the fact that he's bipolar , and all the biplolar meds that he has tried have done nothing but make him worse . So we choose to treat the ADHD with the omega three , along with the Ginkgo & Ginsing - the biploar we just leave it alone but we also make sure we pay attention to each other's moods along the our stress level . Fact of the matter is I know that there is no child or no amount of childran that can ever replace William - nor would I ever try to replace William , William is a very speical, intelligent & unique child - I try to look @ the adoption with William to be my way of giving back - after all William did save my life , by giving me the courage to get out of the relationship with his biological father - because I had not left William's biolgical dad I would have never met jeremy 1 yr & 9 months later .
Aw DANA I really appreciate your wonderful comments & prayers , I knew if there was anyone who would understand , it would be you . Am I happy that my little boy is happy and has adjusted well considering everything that he has been through but another part of me feels as tho I have lost a part of myself . I know that I am only 28 & that I can have more childran - I am lucky to have such a wonderful mate in Jeremy whom I know without a shadow of doubt would be a good daddy but still your first born is always the most special . Jeremy & I went camping this past Thuresday with his twin brother Jason & his wife Tonya - Jeremy told me on friday night as we were sitting by the camp fire deep in the woods , that he knows how incredibly hard all of this custdy mess has been on me - he then told me that now that we have accomplished buying our first home, that he very much desires for us to have a baby of our own . This actually kinda shocked me , I told Jeremy that the last thing I wanted was for us to have a child all because of the void that I have in my heart for William - Jeremy quickly told me that he knows that us having a baby together would never ever replace William with another child , nor could he ever replace William with another child . He then told me that he is very much ready to take that next step , us having a family like we talked about 9 yrs ago when we met ( in sept 2001) he told me that he loves me so much that he can't think of any better way to show that love , than for us to have a little boy or a little girl . Now don't get me wrong , we haven't exzactly been trying to concieve but we haven't exzactly been using any (bc) & it's not that I don't want any childran with Jeremy ( because I have for a very very long time) but I've been so focused on all this custdy mess with William , dealing with Jeremy & I tryin to find us a trailor , the loss of my grand mother - I just figured when god was ready for us to have a child he would let us know - now apparently Jeremy is ready for that to happen sooner than I thaught.
Hi Dana,
It looks like we have alot in common! I am a free lance Make-Up Artist and a licensed Cosmetoligist as well. In addition, I am an Independent Sales Director for Mary Kay Cosmetics. I have always loved the Beauty Business and it seems to be what I do best. I love to make other women look and feel better about themselves. It is very rewarding.
It has been very interesting learning all about ADD and the different ways you can treat it. I look forward to seeing what I can accomplish next with myself and my business. The possibilities are very exciting! I am thrilled to have found this website. Everyone seems so nice and I love reading the questions and answers. I feel very blessed to be a part of this fabulous, creative group of individuals!
Love & Peace,
Joy
Dear Dana, Thanks again for your response. Seems that we are going through a hard day today, though I will not go into the detail. I would covet your prayers. I, too, love Phil 4:19. I also cherish Romans 8:32. What joy when we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus (Hebrews 12:1-3). Please take care and God bless. I shall look at some other threads here. David
Thanks for the welcome, Dana.
And yes... I agree. The doctor I saw for both meds and therapy pointed that out to me. My soon to be ex (still) focuses his stress on my imperfections instead of facing them himself. For example, instead of coming home and talking about his stress, he would focus on a few pairs of pants that had accumulated on a chair in the corner of our room during the work week. He would start ranting about how much of a slob I was and that he couldn't sleep in the room because it stressed him out. He also constantly set me up for failure. He would do the laundary and fold and hang his clothes, but pile mine up in the same chair. He knew that piles were a big problem for me -- it was like he was trying to make me more stressed than him as part of his "release". When I did the laundary, I put all of it away. (That was actually the incident I told my doctor about that brought up the insight I first mentioned). Once my ex was unable to negatively affect me, I suppose he was unable to get that temporary "release" that he was looking for. When I "covered-up" the buttons he used to push, my ex switched to saying I wasn't there for him, I was never in our marriage, etc. It still amazes me how he can say something like that -- something that is so obviously a description of himself -- and not realize how ridiculous it sounded. I was always bending over backwards for him, I always seemed to want his company more than he mine, etc.
It's hard accept, but I know I most likely will never have the luxury of my ex becoming self-aware and stop blaming me for all that is wrong in his life. But, it's the only thing in my control -- that is to be happy in spite of him. I wish I could say that I'm as strong as it sounds I am in my last sentence. But I'm getting there. I love this site!!! I am so glad I found it.
Dear Dana, Thank you much for the nice note! I appreciate it. As I said in my profile bio, my #1 passion is Jesus, and living life in Him... along with Him, I want to learn more and more about this ADD thing. I have a wife and kid, who are so talented in many ways, but often the details of life get in the way of our loving and living to the fullest.
I am enjoying your music and scratching the surface of your blog as I write this. What a depth of knowledge. Please keep it up, don't be a stranger, and God bless.
Sincerely, "New to the Blog" Dave (I took my last name off....)
Hi, Dana
I just moved from Pittsburgh about 3yrs ago and I earned my master from Duquesne Unversity. I thank you for your words of wisdom. I think thatv my middle daughter has ADHD. Did you tell your kids that you have ADHD? The reason why I am asking is because ; I am thinking about telling my kids and would like for some advice on it. It's so nice to find people who really understand about ADHD and self-esteem.
Hi Dana, I visited my Dr. today, she suggested I try beta blockers for my heart. She said I was having Panic Attacks. Then, if this works then I can try some medication. I pray this works. I want God's will done in my life. I appreciate you responding to my email. I pray you are having a blessed day and that all is well with you. I look forward to hearing from you and what's going on with you in your part of the world. Bye for now
Yes, I am a special education teacher. My training qualifies me to teach anyone from preschool children to secondary students. But most of my experience has been with preschool and primary-aged children.
Natural remedies have been the only thing I can use, too, due to the side-effects of most medical interventions... but I have required medical intervention at times when things get too difficult because, as you say, neither is a "cure-all".
I might chat more with you later.... must get on ad do some more work.
Just thought I'd let you know that I am a Christian as well. I am just starting to build my website for the ministry side of my "business"... if you are interested, the link is at www.christian.learn2bebuddies.com.au
Anything & Everything ADHD
DANA's Comments
Comment Wall (533 comments)
You need to be a member of ADDer World Anything and Everything ADHD to add comments!
Join this Ning Network
I lived in Williamston, MI from the age of 6 or 7 years until 57, and then a year ago we moved to Grand Rapids. We are enjoying the hilly, wooded landscape here, unlike the flat Saginaw Valley area that includes Midland :-)
Thanks again for the welcome, I enjoy making new friends!
Kathy
Like you, I wasn't diagnosed until after I'd been an adult for awhile and struggled with writing a great deal. I was in my university's literature program, and my papers were usually late. Though I made A's, I was so frustrated and well, embarrassed really, when I couldn't finish college writing projects that I kept taking time off from college and working in the corporate world. Since beginning college in 1988, it has taken me 20 years to get to the point where I am about to get my doctorate!
For me, I would research extensively, know everything (maybe too much about my topic), and then be unable to write when I sat down to do so. This wasn't terribly conducive to college writing. :)
I am taking medication, which does help me focus. I have also learned that my best time to write, for reasons I can't understand but have grown to respect, is from 3:30 a.m. (!) until 10 a.m. So I go with that, waking up early. (On the good side, it works. And I get to watch the sunrise and hear the birds wake up.) Still, each morning, it takes me around an hour to wake up, let my meds pick in, and begin the actual writing process. I set writing goals for myself each day, and another ADD writer friend and I do weekly goals to make sure we're staying on track.
When I got interested in ADHD and writing, hoping to parlay my own personal difficulties into a useful dissertation topic that might be useful to others, I had to shift from being literature focused to being rhetoric and composition focused, which is another area in my English Department. This switch has not been easy, as there is so much new stuff to learn.
Congrats on getting back into writing. For me, there was so much shame involved in not being able to write. Was that your experience with shame? (Don't answer if you don't want, as that's kinda a personal question - I have found that people sometimes feel it's shameful to talk about shame, which is okay, but unfortunate, I think. Also, can you tell me about the particular writing challenges you faced? When you do write successfully, what do you think enables you to do that?
What other alternative treatments have you used that are successful? I'm looking for all the help I can get here and would love to hear your ideas!
Thanks for writing back to me. I hope to hear back from you!
You've been busy on this site. Sharing your faith is very cool here! I just listened to your 'More Love, More Passion' a couple of times--thanks for the encouragement. God is cool and He never ceases to amaze me... I keep being surprised.
Well, to answer your question: I worked to set goals for the areas in my life that were not easy to focus on. That slowed things down a bit as well as reinforced that those things that I worried about WOULD get handled. With some space from the stress and reinforcement from people in my life, I then moved on to focus on my strengths...positive steps build on each other and dealing with the challenges in life by taking a step at a time...a 'trigger' at a time so that the stress is reduced. Focusing on the 'encouragers' has been huge to stay on track.
Does that make any sense?
It looks like we have alot in common! I am a free lance Make-Up Artist and a licensed Cosmetoligist as well. In addition, I am an Independent Sales Director for Mary Kay Cosmetics. I have always loved the Beauty Business and it seems to be what I do best. I love to make other women look and feel better about themselves. It is very rewarding.
It has been very interesting learning all about ADD and the different ways you can treat it. I look forward to seeing what I can accomplish next with myself and my business. The possibilities are very exciting! I am thrilled to have found this website. Everyone seems so nice and I love reading the questions and answers. I feel very blessed to be a part of this fabulous, creative group of individuals!
Love & Peace,
Joy
And yes... I agree. The doctor I saw for both meds and therapy pointed that out to me. My soon to be ex (still) focuses his stress on my imperfections instead of facing them himself. For example, instead of coming home and talking about his stress, he would focus on a few pairs of pants that had accumulated on a chair in the corner of our room during the work week. He would start ranting about how much of a slob I was and that he couldn't sleep in the room because it stressed him out. He also constantly set me up for failure. He would do the laundary and fold and hang his clothes, but pile mine up in the same chair. He knew that piles were a big problem for me -- it was like he was trying to make me more stressed than him as part of his "release". When I did the laundary, I put all of it away. (That was actually the incident I told my doctor about that brought up the insight I first mentioned). Once my ex was unable to negatively affect me, I suppose he was unable to get that temporary "release" that he was looking for. When I "covered-up" the buttons he used to push, my ex switched to saying I wasn't there for him, I was never in our marriage, etc. It still amazes me how he can say something like that -- something that is so obviously a description of himself -- and not realize how ridiculous it sounded. I was always bending over backwards for him, I always seemed to want his company more than he mine, etc.
It's hard accept, but I know I most likely will never have the luxury of my ex becoming self-aware and stop blaming me for all that is wrong in his life. But, it's the only thing in my control -- that is to be happy in spite of him. I wish I could say that I'm as strong as it sounds I am in my last sentence. But I'm getting there. I love this site!!! I am so glad I found it.
I am enjoying your music and scratching the surface of your blog as I write this. What a depth of knowledge. Please keep it up, don't be a stranger, and God bless.
Sincerely, "New to the Blog" Dave (I took my last name off....)
I just moved from Pittsburgh about 3yrs ago and I earned my master from Duquesne Unversity. I thank you for your words of wisdom. I think thatv my middle daughter has ADHD. Did you tell your kids that you have ADHD? The reason why I am asking is because ; I am thinking about telling my kids and would like for some advice on it. It's so nice to find people who really understand about ADHD and self-esteem.
Thanks for adding me as a friend.
Yes, I am a special education teacher. My training qualifies me to teach anyone from preschool children to secondary students. But most of my experience has been with preschool and primary-aged children.
Natural remedies have been the only thing I can use, too, due to the side-effects of most medical interventions... but I have required medical intervention at times when things get too difficult because, as you say, neither is a "cure-all".
I might chat more with you later.... must get on ad do some more work.
Just thought I'd let you know that I am a Christian as well. I am just starting to build my website for the ministry side of my "business"... if you are interested, the link is at www.christian.learn2bebuddies.com.au
Look forward to chatting more later!
Amanda
Welcome to
ADDer World Anything and Everything ADHD
Sign Up
or Sign In
About
Support
Autographed Book Contest:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To read more click hereFREE Ebooks:
(click images to download)
Feel free to save, share and email these eBooks!
Info about ADDer World, Bryan's Bio, Etc...
Guidlines - Please Read
Badge
Get Badge
© 2009 Created by Bryan Hutchinson on Ning. Create a Ning Network!
Badges | Report an Issue | Privacy | Terms of Service